Well, he's been a bit quiet over the past month or so. I've been really missing that feeling that God is close, that he's almost physically present in my life. So, yesterday, as I was crying out my grief in a prayer, I told God that I missed feeling him, and asked him to come close to me again--to give me a theme, so I'd remember that he is with me.
Today, He confirmed the theme that was already surfacing over the past few days:
God is near.
How did he confirm it? I receive daily scriptures from BibleGateway.com, and they're usually random, encouraging passages from the Bible. This was today's:
The day before that, my incredibly-thoughtful boyfriend gave me a little cell-phone charm of a sheep holding a flower above the Russian words for "God is near." (Have I never shared on my blog that I got a boyfriend 10 days after I landed in Kiev? Sorry to keep you waiting on that bit of juicy gossip. More on that amazing story another blog.)Isaiah 55:6
"Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near."
The day before THAT, I had expressed to friends that God didn't feel as near, and I was wondering if I had gotten off track from His purpose for my life, somehow. Maybe I had sinned, and strayed like wayward sheep I am.... I had been feeling distracted by life and not really consistent or wholehearted in my times with Him for the past few days.
So, I definitely am grateful that God answers prayers, and that in order to feel him near, all I have to do is to seek him with ALL my heart. (Jeremiah 29:11-13) It wasn't that God wasn't near, but that He was waiting for ME to draw near to HIM! (James 4:8)
Thank you, my God, that you want a relationship with me--a real, mutual, give-and-take relationship. You don't force yourself upon me, but let me desire you as much as you desire me. Thank you for wanting that kind of relationship with EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US.
How can you draw near to God this week? Try giving him everything you've got, and see if God doesn't respond.
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