Words and Integrity

Words are powerful, I'm realizing anew.

Being in a foreign country where I don't speak the native tongue, I've had a lot of time to consider language, and the importance of words.

Words are such a huge form of communication...when I say something, I am extending myself to someone. My words may contain love, hope, and joy--or they may contain hate, bitterness, criticism, or fear.

Yet the words are just a communication of what's inside. As Jesus said, "Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks." (Mt 12:34, NIV) Who I am is what comes out of my mouth.

I've also heard a definition of integrity connected with words. That if we do what we say, we are in integrity, and if we don't, we are out of integrity.

So, I looked up the definitions of integrity. Here's one I found which seems to fit:

"Integrity = a concept of consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations and outcomes."

If I am not keeping my word, I am, in a sense, a hypocrite (which means: "a person who pretends to be what he is not").

Without realizing it, I have been a hypocrite in my life in different ways.

For example, when I say I believe God is in control and that I believe he will protect me, then try to take control of a situation I don't feel safe in.

Or, on a smaller scale, when I say that I will meet someone at a certain time, then show up late. Even though I apologize and they forgive me, I wonder...can I even trust my own word when I speak? Does it mean anything to me, or to others, when I make a claim or a promise?

I want my word to mean something--both to others, and myself. I want my words to contain power, like Jesus' did. His contained power because they were true...what he said happened. Without fail. He lived according to what he claimed. He had integrity...he was whole, complete, and without pretense. Jesus was authentic.

I'm so grateful that I can put my hope in his word, because it never fails.

On the other hand, I often find myself speaking to impress people, or to present myself in a way I want to be perceived--then wonder why my life seems to lack impact, or my relationships seem to lack depth.

It's time to start fresh, with small matters!

I need baby-steps. (Any of my former students reading this?  Remember the 7 Habits?)   If I can't master myself (the private victory), how can I make a difference in someone else's life (the public victory)?  I need to build a solid foundation before I take on building an entire structure.

So, where have I been out of integrity lately?  Time-management.  I recently made a good friend of mine wait 20 minutes for me because I forgot to hang up my laundry before leaving the house.  This is not the first time I have been inconsiderate of someone else's time because of my lack of consideration of my own.  I've also been late to church, and barely on time (running) to other appointments.  Is this really the way I want to live my life?  NO WAY, JOSE! 

Before you think I'm being too hard on myself, I realize that this is a deep part of my character that won't change overnight.  But I gotta start somewhere!  Right?

In the school I used to teach, we used to set SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Timely goals.  That way, you can build confidence as you see your success, one baby-step at a time.  As my old college mentor, John Reid, used to say: "A steady drop will break a rock."

My SMART goal: Be 10 minutes early to every appointment this week.   

Which means I've gotta be careful to consider before I speak, so that I speak only what I can follow through with.

And just to make it fun, if I reach my goal, I get to spend $10 on whatever I want!  ;)  Who says personal growth has to be grueling?

I'll keep you posted on how I do!